Refer to the person who is ill or has died by name whenever possible.

Express your condolences (e.g., “I’m very sorry to know that David is seriously ill”. Or “I’m so sad to learn that Manjit has died”.)

Don’t be afraid to use the words “died” or “death” rather than euphemisms, such as “passed away”.

Keep your communication simple and questions to a minimum.

If a death has occurred, ask what information they would like shared with students and staff (e.g., cause or location of death). Also ask about plans for a funeral or memorial service, and, in particular, whether or not staff and students may attend or participate.

Rather than rehearsing what to say next, focus on listening.

Keep in mind that grieving takes up a huge amount of energy. Parents (just like their children) may struggle to concentrate and remember details. In addition to reaching out to the parent(s) over the phone or in person, it can help to follow up with written communication in an email or text.

Offer whatever support you can and provide school contact information for yourself.

Ask if any additional supports or resources would be helpful (e.g., grief counsellors, community mental health workers, bereavement programs, or a crisis team). This is something that you should re-visit at any later contacts.